A few weeks ago Anthony's Bar and No Grill was passing out tickets for a drawing to take place on Tuesday night for no apparent reason. Something to do with the pool tab bar grand opening. So I wake up this morning not feeling 100% and decide to cash in some leave time owed to me by The-Job-I-Can't-Talk-About. Play bills, read barstoolsports.com, eat leftovers, blah blah blah. I get a text from the Big Carrot saying he's at the T-Bar waiting for the drawing as I spot the red tickets on my desk. You know where this is going already. Hop on the scooter and get there ten minutes before they pull a name from the fish bowl. Had to be present to win. Since I'm around the corner I don't hear them call my name right away but see people pointing at me and just like that El Sandinista has a Sanyo 42" HD flatscreen. And no cable. So I donated it to the Mother Frances Shelter. To say Mom wasn't nearly as thrilled as Dad would be a rather major understatement. You'd think the dog died by her reaction but I think Dad thinks I'm f-wording Santa. Not f-wording like screwing that is, f-wording like a cool version of. This may sound more altruistic than it is but as far as anyone needs to know I'm Son of the Year. Had I gone to work today I wouldn't have won. I wonder how much more successful in life I'd be if I quit working altogether. Employment has been holding me back. But seriously, the only other thing I recall ever winning was a gift basket from Cactus Flats....for Father's Day. Still 93 Rainiers left.
