1. Winter Lights Program
2. "Coast Guard City"
Sing along..."TAKE ME DOWN TO A COAST GUARD CITY WHERE THE NATY LIGHT RUNS FREE AND THE GUYS ARE PRETTY, OH WON'T YOU PLEASE SEND THEM HOME..." Thanks Axl. But I kid. Sort of. I have a reputation for being hard on Coasties and this is exaggerated of course but I'm not exactly thrilled about this designation. Look at the other places with the same title.
Grand Haven, Mich (the original)
Eureka, Calif
Mobile, Ala
Morgan City, La.
Wilmington, N.C.
Newport, Ore.
Alameda, Calif.
Quite honestly I don't want to be put in the same boat, pardon my pun, as these other towns. Eureka, California? The City That Smells Like Cancer? No thanks. I went to college seven miles north of Eureka and it is not a USCG Town USA, its Methville with a timber industry going down faster than our fisheries. I barely noticed the Coast Guard presence there and I think Floyd should have insisted Eureka be scratched of the list as part of the deal for adding us. And toss Mobile just because its in Alabama while we're at it. So while The Ambassador votes for moving the city to Near Island she's got the coasties to take claim on the town. This is Rock treason. Now I know all the good the base does for town, the vessels that work the seas, and the number of attractive women they put in the pubs but I'm not puckering up for the those navy blue and orange buttocks yet. Why?
1. Rent. Its not the enlisted man's fault but there is a relation between high rent for locals and the housing assistance the base provides their sailors and sky captains. Maybe if they build even more base housing and get their peeps out of town rent will come back down. Yeah, right.
2. Attitude. I hate these youngsters cruising the bars and spouting off about how this places sucks and how many days left they have until they get transferred. I'm never getting transferred, I've been here a looooong time and they haven't earned the right to complain about rain and Ten-To-One Ratio yet. They need to shut up.
3. Males. Speaking of The Unmagic Number, do we really need more dudes here? I don't even tip them off to the local gals with herpes and TB anymore, they are on their own.
2. Attitude. I hate these youngsters cruising the bars and spouting off about how this places sucks and how many days left they have until they get transferred. I'm never getting transferred, I've been here a looooong time and they haven't earned the right to complain about rain and Ten-To-One Ratio yet. They need to shut up.
3. Males. Speaking of The Unmagic Number, do we really need more dudes here? I don't even tip them off to the local gals with herpes and TB anymore, they are on their own.
4. Land. They have WAY too much property around here while we are crunched into the corner. The Borough should get some of their real estate. GET SOME, JEROME, HOO-RAW!
5. MWR. We used to have unified adult sports in the community until someone out there divided us and thus watered down both town and base leagues. That killed men's softball in Kodiak and nobody has gone to jail for it.
6. Hair Gel. Can't walk into the Villagio anymore without slipping.
7. Holiday Beach. When the closed public access to that it was a real stomach punch to those who grew up here. Seriously.
Having said all that most of the individuals I've met over the years in the Coast Guard are top notch, people like Pat Shaw, Tom Bolen, Zach Jones, James Basinger, and Jeff Harris just to name a few. My beef is really with the government and the policies that disregard civilians. They did get us a golf course and allow us to use the pool when the threat level is down (a pool that is way better than the one we're going to build I might add).
But I will never call Kodiak a Coast Guard City, even if it is truer than most. Kodiak will always be a fishing town. How about Fishing Town USA., Carolyn?
