I just read how former Seahawks place kicker (1982-1990) turned real estate agent Norm Johnson saved a woman in Washington by pulling her from a car that had flipped over into a ditch or pond or Puget Sound, whateva. Hero, right?
WRONG! This guy caused me to have a stoke twice when I was a teenager. The man is immortal because he couldn't even kick a bucket. Seriously, my Dad nicknamed him Leadfoot when I was a kid and not a day has passed in my life where I forgot that.
Despite being the Seahawks all-time leading scorer I feel he should be taken to The Hague with him and his biatch leg put on trial for crimes against humanity, specifically those in the Pacific Northwest where he has the nerve to still reside.
He didn't even do kickoffs when he wore blue-n-green. How weak is that? I still can not even fathom how this man lasted 18 years in the National Football League, let alone half of those with the Hawks. If I could remember all the bad memories and last minutes losses I blocked from my mind I would immediately seek a hypnotist and go back to how I was before. If he walked into Cheers people would boo. Even Woody.
Norm Johnson
Guy Who Missed Trying To Win A Truck At Halftime In Kingdome
John Leypoldt (before my time)
Lou Pinella (kicked bases before turning green and smashing but I'm sure he could split the uprights from 45 yards when it counted)
Todd Peterson (only remember one miss but it was to beat the Raiders)
John Kasay (he couldn't spell his last name) Still in NFL w/Carolina
Soundgarden (kicked arse)
Rian Lindell (he couldn't spell his first name) Still in NFL w/Buffalo
Josh Brown (stud) Still in NFL w/NFC West Champion Seattle Seahawks
Efren Herrera (did national TV ads for Miller Lite back in the day when you could do beer ads and still be an active player. Before role models there was something called real life)
So go ahead. Look up his stats. You won't see the real picture, the trail of pain left in his Johnson wake. If he goes off the turnpike into a frigid body of water don't call me to jump in head first with a crow bar. And if that does happen I hope Joey Galloway is with him.
SIDE NOTE: Speaking of ex-Seahawks turned MotherBuc-er, Tampa Bay's own Jerramy Stevens was suspended ONE GAME for his DUI earlier this year. He was 10 catches of 86 yards this season (sorority girl universal football translator = that sucks). The water is too warm in Florida to off him should he somehow meet a similar fate going off the highway so the best we can hope for is a shark. Of course he'll hit his grandma's house....again... before actually going into the sea and the weather is too warm for black ice so we'll assume it was Guinness. I kind of don't like him.
WRONG! This guy caused me to have a stoke twice when I was a teenager. The man is immortal because he couldn't even kick a bucket. Seriously, my Dad nicknamed him Leadfoot when I was a kid and not a day has passed in my life where I forgot that.
Despite being the Seahawks all-time leading scorer I feel he should be taken to The Hague with him and his biatch leg put on trial for crimes against humanity, specifically those in the Pacific Northwest where he has the nerve to still reside.
He didn't even do kickoffs when he wore blue-n-green. How weak is that? I still can not even fathom how this man lasted 18 years in the National Football League, let alone half of those with the Hawks. If I could remember all the bad memories and last minutes losses I blocked from my mind I would immediately seek a hypnotist and go back to how I was before. If he walked into Cheers people would boo. Even Woody.
My All-Time List of Seattle Kickers
Least to Most Liked
Least to Most Liked
Norm Johnson
Guy Who Missed Trying To Win A Truck At Halftime In Kingdome
John Leypoldt (before my time)
Lou Pinella (kicked bases before turning green and smashing but I'm sure he could split the uprights from 45 yards when it counted)
Todd Peterson (only remember one miss but it was to beat the Raiders)
John Kasay (he couldn't spell his last name) Still in NFL w/Carolina
Soundgarden (kicked arse)
Rian Lindell (he couldn't spell his first name) Still in NFL w/Buffalo
Josh Brown (stud) Still in NFL w/NFC West Champion Seattle Seahawks
Efren Herrera (did national TV ads for Miller Lite back in the day when you could do beer ads and still be an active player. Before role models there was something called real life)
So go ahead. Look up his stats. You won't see the real picture, the trail of pain left in his Johnson wake. If he goes off the turnpike into a frigid body of water don't call me to jump in head first with a crow bar. And if that does happen I hope Joey Galloway is with him.
SIDE NOTE: Speaking of ex-Seahawks turned MotherBuc-er, Tampa Bay's own Jerramy Stevens was suspended ONE GAME for his DUI earlier this year. He was 10 catches of 86 yards this season (sorority girl universal football translator = that sucks). The water is too warm in Florida to off him should he somehow meet a similar fate going off the highway so the best we can hope for is a shark. Of course he'll hit his grandma's house....again... before actually going into the sea and the weather is too warm for black ice so we'll assume it was Guinness. I kind of don't like him.
